Saving Face

In our home, we have a rule, before anyone can get their license they have to memorize the WHOLE book of James. Yes, you read this correctly. I'd love to take credit for this idea but I can't. I got the idea from Joe White's book "Faith Training". It's one of the books I recommend to the left of this post. He uses Bible memorization for different reasons but at the time, I didn't have children even close to driving age. I was so proud of this decision. However, I didn't realize the full impact of it. Oh, the drama that ensued. How difficult, how unfair (not a good word to use at me), it's their right to drive (cleared that one up REAL fast) etc. Obviously, I had no sympathy for them. But as 16 came and went for our oldest child, I realized that it was I who was needing sympathy. While all my friends used their kids for errands and no longer had to run here and there to pick them up, I continued my frenzied taxi service and had an internal pity party. I kept telling myself that this was for the best and I needed to stick to my guns, all the while wishing that I would have never made that rule. But I knew well enough, that rules were rules and by quashing what I spouted as an excellent idea, I'd lose my edge in the future. Regardless of how it affected me, I HAD to stick to my guns.

I learned two things. Waiting is not so hard when you are on the other side of it, and sometimes there are things in your life that you CAN do but possibly SHOULD NOT do. Drew didn't get his license until he was 18. Now that he has been driving for over 6 mos. I am past the struggle of carting everyone around. He gets himself and often his siblings to places I can't be or frankly, don't want to be. But nothing prepared me for the day that we invited our Youth Pastor and his family over to facilitate the recitation of the book of James. We sat there, dumbfounded, as Drew recited, no almost preached the word of God, from memory. And as each couple of verses passed his lips his eyes lit up more and more. All the other children in the room stared in awe of him knowing full well that the standard was being set and the bar was high. Our youth pastor's teens were praying diligently that their parents wouldn't adopt this idea themselves, I'm sure. And maybe for the first time in his life, Drew understood that he was accomplishing something great. That he was doing something with relative ease, something that took months of work... something that most people don't think they can do. For that moment, I would have taxi'd the family around for another year or two.

The other thing I learned was that he was probably not ready to drive. Just because it would have been legal for him to drive didn't mean he was supposed to. And for him, James was a good excuse. Frankly, I didn't care one bit if he used his hard-nosed parents as an excuse for his lack of a driver's license when his friends were all signing up for their parking spots at school. If he needed that as an excuse than so be it. It's better he not do something that he's not ready for than to go along with what's "permitted" to save face.

I occasionally wondered if there's a parallel here. After all, the Bible often uses the description of Father and child to describe the relationship believers have with Him. Could there be things in my life that are "permissible" but not appropriate for me now? Do I need to have a few apparently unrelated things come into my life in order that what I think I could jump into, something that seems like a good thing, is put off until I'm more prepared? I don't know. But I think it's possible. After all, no one knows me as well as He does. He made me and prepared a special work for me in advance. (Eph. 2:10) He knows what He expects of me, what He wants of me, and how I will perform. If I need something to "save face" He'll provide that for me, even if I don't realize it.

There are three more siblings that all have to accomplish the task that Drew accomplished. #2 son is on Chapter 2. He knows he has a lot to live up to. AND the word has gotten out - the number of people who want to be present for his recitation are too numerous to count. Oh, and by the way - he could have gotten his license LAST week. :)